


self-doubt

by olc_sionnach



Category: Original Work
Genre: Anxiety, Disabled Character, Everyone Is Gay, Gen, Marijuana, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:28:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22012594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/olc_sionnach/pseuds/olc_sionnach
Summary: A vent based on something that happens a lot ahha.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4
Collections: Vents





	self-doubt

**Author's Note:**

> CW: recreational drug use

"Come ooon!" Sophia drawled, pulling on James's arm.  
"Dude," Aaron huffed a laugh "give in, you know you're gonna go anyways."

The group of teens wanted to walk down to the city river and smoke a joint amongst themselves. They all just finished their weekly youth club meeting and Sophia in particular seemed to be suffocating in the confines of the small building.

She finally seems to lessen her grip though, and James lets out an overexaggerated sigh.  
Sparing a glance, the rest of the teens seem to perk up at James relentment.  
"Fine," he says, voice flattened to a monotony "We'll go".  
Sophia pumps a fist into the air with a loud "whoop!" and Aaron just laughs while the rest of their friends cheer on.

Amongst the chatter however nobody seemed to notice Ben's look of concern as he glances down at his walking aid.  
Still, he forces a strained smile towards his friends.

-

James and Ben are close friends.  
They might not have known each other for particularly long but the two still enjoy one another's company.  
Before James joined the Youth Club, he was anxious down to the core.  
Fidgety, restless and pure unadulterated panic radiated off the boy so strongly that Ben was worried that one wrong move might send the poor guy into a fight or flight response.  
However, once Ben forced James to join the Youth Club, James really started to bloom.  
He made friends, other than him and Sophia. It was.. honestly scary, but in a good way.  
Ben was happy for him.

But lately he can't help but feel left out.  
You see, James is a very restless person. He can't just sit in the same spot for an hour he has to be moving, walking, jumping, you name it.  
This isn't an issue to Ben of course but, well, Ben is disabled.  
He needs a mobility aid to walk, and even then he can't walk long distances.  
James of course, accepted this and it was never an issue. He understood that Ben needed breaks when they were walking around the city together, or when Ben simply couldn't walk at all.

But now? Now it's different.  
James wants to be social now, he's out of his bubble at last! And the last thing Ben wants is to hold him back.  
He has to be there for him.  
It's just hard.  
-

They all hurry out the back door of the building and run up the steps, following James's lead.  
Sophia waits at the top as always, for Ben to make it up.  
She's always been kind like that, an open outstretched hand to help him whenever he needs it.

Once he makes it up he looks up to see an uncharacteristic frown resting on her features.  
"Soph?" He asks  
"I.." she trails off, biting her lip  
"I'm sorry" Sophia looks so genuinely upset that Ben can't help but frown in response  
"Why? You have nothing to be sorry for." And it's true. She doesn't. He has no clue where this is coming from.  
"No it's just," she wrings her hands anxiously "walking down to the river, it's going to be so painful for you." She grimaces.

Ben spares a glance at James who is now holding a rat and chasing Aaron down with it.  
He internally cringes but can't help the smile that makes itself known on his face as he watches.  
Turning back to Sophia he puts a comforting hand on her shoulder, "You're always looking out for me, Soph. Thank you."  
Her frown morphs into a fond, understanding smile.  
"Of course." She replies  
Without even asking, she links her arm around the arm that Ben isn't holding his walking stick in.  
Ben smiles at her.

Sophia returns the smile then starts walking forward to James and the rest of the group.  
"C'mon, let's go stop James from picking up anymore rats before he gets rabies."


End file.
